Planning my Summer

Now I know you all think this is a little premature - especially those of you who are still looking at snow. Here's the thing. Spring break is in two and a half weeks. We all know that spring break is really just a dry run for how nutty things are going to get over the looooooong summer break. That being said, I think it is completely appropriate for me to start planning now.

Here's my list of things that I would be willing to do, vlog and blog for the small fee of some corporate sponsorship. Hey! They are getting behind all kinds of techno Internet promos now and I'm a pretty entertaining person if I do say so myself so I can't see that I could severely hurt anyone. And I have Twitter, Facebook and my two awesome blogs on my side. So here's the list Corporate PR people. Feel free to contact me when you're ready to get behind me.

Remodel my house.
I was thinking that this one could be sponsored by a LOT of companies thus spreading the cost out and minimizing the impact on any one company. I think some appropriate sponsors would be Home Depot (we all know how I feel about Homer), Bed Bath and Beyond, Pier One, Rooms To Go, Behr or the DIY Network. Duct Tape or 3M could also get involved because child restraint and painters tape would definitely be involved. See guys, all you have to do is provide the supplies. I'll provide the sweat, swearing, and crying.

Redo my entire landscaping front and back.
Homer, you are in on this one too. DIY you could come hang out too. Caterpillar, I know you guys are in need of some good face time and I'm sure there are some trees to come down or other front loader/skid loader projects (like spreading topsoil) so I saved some space for you. You may want to send a licensed operator though because I can't guarantee my heavy machinery skills.

And the BIG ONE that I would really knock out of the park for everyone - The East Coast Road Trip!
I have Winnebago, WalMart or Target, and Exxon or BP tagged for this one. Rand-McNally we'll be needing your help too unless Tom Tom or Garmin wants to kick in (just in case Winnie gives me a model that doesn't have a navigation system). I'll go to whatever East Coast landmark or city you want. But know this; if you choose some educational spots, you would expand your campaign base by labeling yourself the Education Company!

So you ask yourself what you get in return? You get your name plastered all over every blog, vlog and my forehead related to your endeavor. You get my dry wit and humor. And you get one free commercial on network TV because you will undoubtedly be so awestruck by my mad skills at PR that you will want to sign me for an enormous contract as a spokesperson.

I should offer a claimer that I really would do all of these things this summer if funds were available. I should also note that while I am not a review or PR blog you can bet your paint rollers and Tang that I would take every single one of these companies up on their offer if they said they would do it.