Mom Tip #50

Just because you knew where it was five minutes ago, doesn’t mean you still know where it is.

When did moms become a GPS system? Is it part of mom gear that I received upon giving birth and I just failed to recognize my upgrade?

There is a commercial for a refrigerator (Sorry marketing people. If you were trying to make your brand name stick you missed your mark.) in which everyone is calling Mom asking her where x, y and z are. I would rather not assume that I am speaking for every woman in the world who has children, but I am pretty darn sure that the vast majority of us HATE that commercial!

Sadly, this is a real page from life as a mom. Where’s my phone? Where are my shoes? Have you seen my screwdriver? Where is my snack? Where did my book go? Have you seen my backpack?

The answers in order are, on the charger in the kitchen. I have to be specific because even though the charger has been in the same place for six months doesn’t mean the follow up, “And where is the charger?” question won’t be asked. Your shoes are in the playroom where you took them off. The screwdriver is in the garage on the shelf beside the clippers where you left it. You ate your snack so it’s in your belly. Your book is under your bed where you hid it from your brother. Your back pack is in the car waiting for you to get moving for school.

But then there are the moments when YOU the Mom need something. It is never where you left it! My hairbrush which I left in the bathroom drawer was behind the living room couch; my toothbrush was under my bed – thank you Munch; and my shoes were out on the deck because why wouldn’t they walk out of the closet on their own? And if you ask where something is you get, “Uh dunno.” Do they get up and help you look? No. Do they remember when they had it last? Of course not. Is there a point in even asking? Nope!

You are now saying to yourself, “I wonder what started this rant.” Just a few minutes ago I came to the computer to check my e-mail only to pull out the keyboard shelf and have my keyboard missing. Just when you think you know where you left it…