Mom Tip #54

If you want it done right,…well, you know the rest.

L.M. Lion confessed today. He really cannot clean the kitchen. He tries sometimes and I have to give him credit for that. But he really is not good at it.

The dishwasher ends up loaded inefficiently; the clean silverware ends up a jumbled mess; the counters get a lick (from the dog probably) and a promise (that the Zookeeper will be done folding laundry soon) on the best of days; and the mop asks him for ID if he even looks in its direction. Lion looked at me today with the most pitiful of looks I have seen from him in a while and said, “Please, can you do it? You’re just so much better at it than me. And it will get done faster.” The “faster” is what got to me. The rest of the exhibits were clamoring for food and there was no way they were getting any from the kitchen in its current state.

So L.M. Lion took off to get fuel for his leaf blower so that he could complete a “man” project while I tackled the disaster area before FEMA showed up. By the time he got back from the gas station and got his yard shoes on I had reestablished that counters DID actually exist and had scoured a layer of…something out of a few pots in the sink. Before he was done with the yard the counters and stove top had been cleaned, the floor had been swept and the mop had thanked me for not letting him fall into the hands of that mad man who had been eyeballing him. The small exhibits were enjoying their rations and even the dog had a look of gratitude for clearing a path to his food bowl.

Moms, I know we wish our significant others would help more with the housework. But do we really mean it? Really? Deep down we know that we are going to end up redoing the things they don’t do to our liking and we really don’t want to help in the yard anyway.

I’m just saying. If you want it done right,…well, you know the rest.