A Moment Away from the Zoo

Please pardon me while I diverge from the normal Zoo nonsense. I have found myself thinking deeper than usual Zoo related thoughts today and really wanted to share. We will return to the normal level of insanity sooner than I would like, I am sure.

If you have not been by The Bowl today, take a moment and pop over. And that is not the traffic directing ploy it looks like - it really is relevant. Earlier today I let a vent go about our gas situation and then an apologetic letter to Karma for my outburst. Now I have had vacuuming and two loads of laundry to ponder the gas situation more and have a whole new perspective.

Every time we have gotten in the van for the past two days I have muttered under my breath, "God give me enough to get there and back." Maybe not your most faithful prayer and certainly not something I expected anyone to pay attention to. But then we got the call from the Lion today and went to the station that had gas. As we pulled up, Tuck piped up from the back seat, "Hey Mom! God heard you! He gave us gas!!" Eye opening in and of itself wouldn't you say!

As we sat there waiting our turn I peeked in the side view mirror to see how the line was going. Several cars back there was an older body damaged car that looked like it might need an extra push to get to the pump. I looked past it quickly without really noting. Then it was our turn and I busied myself with swiping my card and hitting all the right buttons and putting the nozzle in my tank. It was my full intention to fill up and top off my tank. The Tie was not going to have another opportunity to stick it to me any time soon!

Then I saw that car again. This time though I saw the people in the car. It was a family with two car seats. The mother let a small smile pass her face every time her hubby pulled into the next place in line. The father kept looking over at her and giving her reassuring smiles which faded as soon as she looked away. The anxiety was so incredibly clear as they got one car closer. Would there be enough? Would they be the last car to get a tank?

I stopped the pump. I knew I only had about half a tank but I just could not put any more in my van. Where do I go everyday? To pick Mo up from school and bring her home. That's it - three miles round trip. Where did that father go every day in that car that was already on its last leg? What if the seven gallons I didn't put in my van gave him a chance to take one extra shift? What would that mean to his family? Would it make a difference?

I did not know those answers. I had no idea if I was going to make any difference. But I knew how I felt when The Tie took more than I thought he needed. It just wasn't in me to do that to a family that seemed to be in need. I knew I was going to have to explain to Lion why I only had half a tank. I knew he was going to say I was foolish but then he would look as his children and give me a hug and that smile that admits I was right - just not out loud.

I didn't give Tuck a lecture about taking just what you need on the way home. I didn't even mention the God statement again. As I watched him smiling and looking out the window on the way home I thanked God for giving me gas and a heart to share it.