How to Tell You're a Grown Up by The Orangutan

It was feeding time at the Zoo Thursday night and the small exhibits were gathered around their corn dogs chomping away with glee. Lion and I were discussing whether we should have egg noodles or rice under our beef tips. It was a pleasant little Cleaver scene when Rhino decided he was done.

He got up from the table, pooched his belly out as big as he could get it and said, "See Mom! I'm all full."

Before I could say a word Orangutan jumped in. "Rhino, if your belly is getting that big it must mean you are getting to be a grown up because grown ups have big bellies. Well, Daddy grown ups do but Mommy grown ups don't. The have straight down flat bellies."

Lion and I just looked at each other and started to laugh but I composed myself and I asked the inevitable question, "Orangutan, why? Why are grown up Daddy bellies big and Mommy bellies flat?"

"That's easy Mom! Because Daddys eat a lot and lot of food and just sit and Mommys don't eat very much at all."

They don't? Why don't mommys eat?

"Because they are too busy working and feeding everybody and taking care of everybody and being bossed around. They don't get to eat breakfast or lunch and they only get to eat dinner if the kids are done eating and will leave them alone."

She's going to be a great mom. With a flat belly.

Must be a Daddy Tang!

Mom Tip #22: You will NEVER be sick again.

I just saw a tweet from blogging buddy Tanya from Mommy Goggles which led me to a post on her page. Mommies aren't supposed to get sick! Now I knew I had written a Mom Tip about this but I wasn't sure if I had ever actually published it and after much searching I realized that you were all missing out. So here it is!

Mom Tip #22: You will never be sick again!

Isn’t that wonderful news?! Oh, I promise. You will still catch bugs and you will still FEEL like you’re sick. But you will never REALLY be sick ever again.

Allow me to illustrate. I have had a ridiculous, out of control, kill me now sinus infection for two weeks now. My eyes are being held in by my contacts; Kleenex and Tylenol have offered me stock options; and fish can hear more clearly than I can right now. But I’m not sick!

We were coming home from the grocery store a few nights ago and Molly asked me why I was so sad (she could see my reflection in the review mirror). I told her that I wasn’t sad; I was just sick and feeling really crummy.

"Well, when we’re sick you make us go to bed Mom so maybe you should take a nap!"

My mood improved immediately! Sure Mo! As soon as we get home.

Then the other shoe dropped. "I mean AFTER you make dinner and we get our baths and you make our popcorn and start our movie. THEN you can take a nap!"

And that’s how it works for Mom. Daddy can get sick and we wait on him hand and foot and nurse him back to health. The kids get sick and we stop sleeping for weeks at a time until they are breathing normally and sleeping through the night again.

We get "sick" and we continue to pack lunches with a dishtowel over our nose and mouth to keep from contaminating anything. We change sheets and fold laundry with one hand while we blow with the other. We get sick in the toilet and then take a moment to clean the bathroom while we brush our teeth.

Isn’t it amazing what pregnancy did for your immune system?! Hello OB – Goodbye, general practitioner!

The Great Switch-a-Room Day 9: Are we Done Yet?

The Great Switch a Room Day 7: Paint FINALLY Goes Up!

You've been stalking all day to see if there was an update right? Sorry it took so long to get here but if you could see my hands right now you would know what I was doing.


Poor Lion. He wanted so badly to help me paint but he was lacking the finesse and patience to get the same sponging result that I was getting and he liked my version better. He went so far as to completely clean all the paint off one stripe and try from scratch only to frustrate himself more. So he grudgingly moved out and waited patiently for me to finish. And friends, I assure you that there is absolutely NO sarcasm here. He really wanted to paint for his two little princesses and I'm getting a little faklempt that he wasn't able to.


Now, I ask you, how many days did it take me to tape off the room? Three? Ask me how long it took me to paint. Three hours. No kidding. Three hours and only a quart of paint. So now we have a full gallon (because you had to add 1 quart of glaze to the paint) of Pepto pink paint with glaze that we have no clue what to do with.


I suggested that we give it to the exhibits and let them go nuts in the playroom but Lion vetoed that. It's not like I don't also have avacado green and sky blue that they could play with too and if you consider that the room is already Big Bird yellow with Emerald City green carpet, how much worse could they really make it? But I digress.


Tomorrow we go snag the new knobs for the dresser and the curtain and valance for the window and then we are ready for moving day on Sunday! Saturday will be dedicated to taking all the other furniture out of the room and cleaning the carpet.


I'm starting to get really excited again. We are getting close to the finish line in this marathon and I have to tell you that I'm glad we didn't move in last weekend. The room is going to look so much cuter now. Lesson learned - slow down and be flexible. But don't tell Lion! He'll never let me live it down!


By the way, those of you who are wondering why we switched from vlogging mode? I'm saving it all for the big reveal on Monday! You won't even get pictures except maybe of some bits and fragments of things I buy for the room. Oh yeah! Who knows how to drive her blog traffic?

To my Friend J Jiggety

And any of my other followers who are teachers.


I am writing to apologize to you. I know that your job as a teacher is made infinitely more difficult by parents who do not take advantage of teachable moments and expose their children to new and interesting opportunities and experiences. I understand that science is one of those subjects that can use all the parental assistance possible as it is as much observational as it is hands on.


I am confessing to you right now that I intentionally avoided one such learning experience this afternoon on the way home from school. As we left to go to carpool duty, I noticed that one of our neighborhood sciurus carolinenis (squirrel) had met his (or her) demise on the street leading out of the neighborhood. Having grown up in a rural area I did not give it a second thought because, well, life happens like that. You think you've dodged a bullet and then you see the garbage truck grill.


We completed our assigned rounds and were pulling back into the neighborhood when I observed a cathartes aura (turkey buzzard) feasting on our fresh carrion. I must admit that I sped up a little. Initially my hope was to make said fowl lift off in flight but then I was reminded that should these particular aviators have a full stomach upon lift off they will void said organ. Not what I want to park in the garage. Therefore it became my intent to swiftly ease past my dining friend without startling him or drawing attention to his meal of choice.


I really had no desire to explain to my children why their favorite Over the Hedge character had just become an afternoon snack. I recognize that in doing so I missed out on a tremendous teaching opportunity. I beg your forgiveness and promise that when they are a little older (say 12?) I will make amends by seeking out feasting cathartes auras.


Thank you for understanding my situation and forgiving my cowardice.


Sincerely,
The Zookeeper

The Great Switch-a-Room Day 6: By the Numbers

No vlog today because all I could really show you is a blue and white jail cell. No kidding! With all the tape on the walls to mark out the stripes it really looks like a blue and white cell. I find it funny because this project is feeling like a life sentence right now.

So to pick up my mood a little before I head in "there" for my 14 feet of servitude I thought I would give you the rundown of how this project has been going - by the numbers.

1 - the number of people currently working on the project.

31/2 - the number of rolls of painter's tape that have given their lives.

3 - the number of children who have provided non-stop interruptions.

2 - the number of drinks that have been spilled on the carpet to date (why do I feel like this is not done?)

851 - the number of times I shot myself in the face with the laser level today.

1,704,269 - the number of times I have climbed the ladder or have asked my children to please get off the ladder.

45 - the number of minutes I searched for my pencil after one of said children's interruptions.

1 - the number of laser levels that fell off the wall while I was searching for the pencil.

6 - the number of funky pencils that are in junk drawer

0 - the number of funky pencils in the junk drawer that are sharpened

35 - the number of minutes I searched for a pencil sharpener to sharpen a new pencil since the other one went on strike.

18 - the number of times I passed the bathroom mirror before I noticed that the "missing" pencil was stuck through my pony tail.

436 - the number of times I was able to pound my head against the wall before I passed out.

Did I mention that I'm ready for this project to be done? There is one more wall to tape off and then we launch into sponging mode. How many times to you think I'll lose my sponge? And where will I find it?

I probably don't even want to know!

Wordless Wednesday: Cheap Labor

But Agent CPS, I SWEAR they volunteered!

Looking for more Wordless Wednesday? Hit up those rock stars over at MomDot. I hear they have the goods!

The Great Switch-a-Room Day 4: Part 2

Remember how I was supposed to be taping off the girls' room for painting? How I had a wonderful plan and all my supplies? Remember that?

Someone please tell me what happened! I got one wall to the 75% point and promptly ran out of painter's tape. That's ok. I'll just pick some up on my way home from picking Orangutan up from school. I can do this!

We made our Home Depot run (Homer owes me stock.) and headed for home. I distributed snacks and juices and set everyone to playing so sweetly together and headed for The Room. I finished off the last few stripes with a flourish and set to measuring out and marking off the second wall. Suddenly I had company. Lots of company. Three children, two dogs, a ladder, crib, rocking chair and two stinky butts. ::Sigh::

Buck up chick! I changed the butts, refilled some juices and reentered The Blasted Room. No sooner had I gotten positioned to mark off stripes under the window than I heard, "Oh No Mama! Juice down mess me!" Don't look. Don't look. Why is my sock wet? Crap!

There is Marmoset dripping oj and a puddle spreading around her feet. Derailed again. So I clean her up - again. I give her a new cup and try to resume my project. But by now the damage has been done. I am now subjected to a perpetual parade of "Mom! She snatched from me!" "Mom, he drew on the chair!" "Mom, she did it too!" Mom, Mom, Mom! So as I tuck my weary behind in bed I have gotten one wall taped off and the other started.

I would hold out hope for tomorrow but it's an early release day. Yeah. That's going to be a thrill a minute!

The Great Switch-a-Room Day 4: Paint Prep

Will this project ever end?!

Mom Tip Monday: Unexpected Projects

Those of you who have been following my Great Switch-a-Room know that I have been confronted full force with an unexpected project. I thought it was only appropriate to share some Dos and Don'ts of unexpected project management.

Don't: Panic. That's what happened to me yesterday. I had my brain set on "moving" and it simply did not happen. Looking back (without the aggravation factor) I should have expected to have to clean the bed frames. I mean, what mom isn't going to clean something before she puts it in her children's room? Duh!

Do: Slow down. Unless you are up against a deadline imposed by someone else, you can be flexible. I wanted it all done YESTERDAY but it wasn't going to happen. I had to back off make a list of the steps that needed to happen before move in and create a plan of attack.

Don't: Lose your temper. It just gave me a stomach and headache and really made everyone's day miserable. And there was no reason. After Lion and I both stepped back and looked at the project ahead of us, we reached a compromise within a 3 minute conversation. Before that we were just standing in the garage shooting daggers at each other.

Do: Tap into your creativity. Even if you don't think you have any, a walk though Home Depot, Bed Bath and Beyond or JoAnn Fabrics will start the thinking and provide a little inspiration even if it is just in colors. Then prepare to reign yourself in. I have about a million ideas floating around in my head but the reality is that I will only be able to execute on paint, window treatments and art on the wall.

Well, now I am off to prep the furniture for cleaning. The kids have agreed to help so it should be an interesting afternoon after we pick up the Orangutan! By the way, the girls have decided on pink so Mom has her eye on some cute polka dot panels at Bed Bath and Beyond and I'm studying up on sponging techniques. Wish me luck!

The Great Switch-a-Room Day 2: Part 2

But Sarah! You promised there would be footage. Well, yes, I did. But there is none. Would you like to know why?

Because NOTHING happened.

Lion DID go pick up the beds. However he came home and informed me that we needed to refinish them and paint the girls' room before we installed anything. Let's just account for the next 5 hours by saying "less than pleasant." Orangutan is dissappointed to still be in her "old bed" and Rhino is annoyed that he is still in "squeaky bed and SHE's still here!"

The only one who really could not possibly care less is Marmoset. A compromise was reached this afternoon after the Zookeeper escaped the gates for an hour or two. Yes the room will be painted - more accurately I will sponge another color over the white. But the beds and dresser will have to be content with a good cleaning and possible touch up. Hopefully next weekend will be the actual install if not sooner.

And so Switch-a-Room enters a third day - aren't you all giddy with delight? There's a several Mom Tips in here. I'd stay tuned if I were you!

The Great Switch-a-Room: Day 2 Part 1

The Great Switch-a Room: Day 1

Can We Talk about Moving for a Minute?

No, the Zoo is not relocating to a suburb near you. I heard that collective sigh of relief! Don't think I won't remember this.

What I am talking about is moving children. We have been stalling on putting Rhino in his own big bed and moving Marmoset out of the crib. We really can't stall anymore because the child can put the side of the crib down and put herself to bed now. It sounds cool but I assure you it is not. That means that sooner than later she will figure out that her arms are long enough to reach down and release the catch thus freeing herself as well.

Now I know putting her in the toddler bed or her own big girl bed is not going to be much different but at least then I can retrain her. So we were investigating bunk beds. Grand Keeper and Silverback were going to get them so that Rhino could have his own bed for his birthday but they are 600 miles away so the logistics were killing us.

Then Lion called me today from work. Ms. M has a set of off white bunk beds with the mattresses, a dresser and a mirror that she will freecycle to us. We'll just owe her one. We can pick them up on Sunday.

Holy Housing Issues Batman! I have to prep two rooms for the grand swap-a-roo in less than 48 hours. Dismantle and stash the crib and rocking chair, sort through a butt load of clothes, find two more sets of bedding and (most importantly) come to grips with the fact that for the first time in 5 years there will not be a baby within our gates.

Do you know what this means? The next time I say, "If you're gonna throw a fit, you can just go sit!" to Marmoset, she'll actually have a place to sit. No more dragging a Rhino out from under his bed in the morning. Orangutan will actually be able to go to bed with someone who sleeps on her same schedule - not an hour and a half behind.

I can finally paint a boy room and a girl room. No more gender neutral. I could just about cry. But instead I think I'm going to go whip up a little cocktail and celebrate the fact that I am one step closer to no more diapers - EVER!

And that's exactly how immaculate their room will stay too.

Ouch! I think I just snorted vodka!

Mom Tip #64: Lacking Motivation? Schedule the Cable Guy!

Now maybe this should really go under one of my Mom Tips You can Use but oh well.

I have a spare exhibit this week so not only has my glorious routine been blown to smithereens but my disaster quotient has been exceptionally high. I promise you I can have a room spotless, walk away to blow my nose and come back to worse than it was before I cleaned. It's amazing! They are like those sister twisters in Twister. You know the ones that were flinging the cow around? Yeah. That's Marmoset and her cohort. Holy Flying Cows, Batman!

Yesterday I just gave up. I really said out loud so that the children and Lion could hear, "That's it! I quit. If the tornado warning carries the house away at least I'll have a God sent reason for the disaster!" They looked at me like I was nuts and went about their destruction.

This morning I woke up and scrambled to get Orangutan out for Cuddle Up and Read Day which involved both of us putting on our clean PJ's, gathering up some books and flying out the door. Halfway through my visit to OAT I remembered that the cable guy was going to be at our house between 11 and 2. It was 9. Lion had not left for the hunt yet so I knew the kitchen had exploded, the playroom was a left over nightmare, and the living room was probably in such shambles that the cable guy couldn't even get to the TV.

I zipped home as quickly as possible. Load and run the dishwasher while I speed pack a lunch for Lion. Kick toys into the cubby under the TV while I rip the vacuum around the carpet. Snatch the sheets off the beds because if they are in the washer I have a reason for the beds being unmade, right? Then it was a slide down the stairs and a quick scoop and stash in the playroom. Speed twirl the vacuum around the playroom and back up the stairs to save the kitchen. Unloading and reloading the dishwasher with one hand while I run the mop water and wipe down the counters with the other. Scrape a layer of sludge off the kitchen floor (that I just did yesterday) while herding the Twister Sisters off the wet floor. Go redo the living room where the Twister Sisters have been hanging out.

You know what? I should probably reconnect the cable boxes so that the cable guy can see what the problem was.
Are you )*&@$%^() kidding me?!
The cable is working?

But at least I have the afternoon off right?

Shameless Self Promotion!

Ok, people. Just so all of you know Zookeeper is not my only title. I am also Maid over at Notes from the Toilet Bowl. Today I launched a new feature that I hope will lighten everyone's hearts in a world of crummy news. It's called Show me the Funny! So if you wrote something funny or if you read something funny earlier this week or last week stop by there and drop it off in my linky so that we can all chuckle and take a laugh break today.

I'd love to stay and chat more but the cable guy is here in an hour and a half (I'm an optimist) and the playroom looks like WalMart threw up. Have a great day and don't forget to ...
Show me the Funny!

Mom Tip #63: Parenting Knows no Limits.

It is a whole new day at Zoo Suburbia. A day I never even imagined much less anticipated. Ladies and Gentlemen. Loyal Readers. Friends.

Lion and I are paying for poop.

Soak that in for a minute (or maybe not). We are paying for poop. Those of you who have been with the Zoo for a while know that Rhino is being particularly hard headed about the potty training issue. He turns four in a month and there is still no real consistency to his pottying except that you are consistently confused, frustrated, exasperated and beaten down.

Last night we may have had a break through. He was sitting on my lap and "broke wind" (that is such a weird phrase!) and suddenly jumped up and said, "Mom, I gotta go poop." Well, run like the wind little man! Fly away to the potty!

And he did his thing! Woo Hoo and Party at the Zoo! I made a HUGE deal of it and gave out celebration marshmallows and was all excited. Lion called and I let Rhino deliver the news and we had another celebration on the phone and Lion said those magic words, "I'll bring a surprise home for you!" And then he forgot.

Resourceful Lion that he is he took Rhino to the Lion's Den and snagged some pennies out of the change bowl. Then the wheeling and dealing started. "Hey Dad? If I pee and poop in the potty some more can I have more monies?" Sure pal! A penny for the pees and two pennies for the poops.

I have a working score card upstairs. I swear everytime he takes a sip of juice he is going to the bathroom to squeeze out two drops. Who would have ever imagined that I would pay for poop?

How much do you suppose this little trick would cost me?

Mom Tip #62: Know your Limits.

I can handle three children at a time. There was a period last summer where I was balancing six children at a time but I call that my Loonie Period and really don't remember much of it. At least I came out with both of my ears. I think. Yeah, they're both there.

But I know I can handle three at a time. Yesterday I had a fourth because Orangutan didn't have OAT and my spare exhibit is here this week. Yesterdayday I started to consider my stance on drinking before noon. But I know I can handle three.

Lion asks for extra exhibits from time to time. I tell him no - three is my limit. He begs. He pleads. He talks sweet and he tells me how cute I was when I was preggers and how sweet it is to fall asleep with a baby on your chest. That's when I schedule a day like today.

Yesterday was a day when I intentionally called him half way through the third hour of screaming and running laps around the kitchen, dining room, living room circuit. I made sure I called him when the very large, very loud stray dog was throwing itself at the front door. I made sure I talked to him in the middle of the playroom meltdown. Side note: Gravity is what takes the toys off the shelf and children cannot battle gravity. But that's for another day.

And still he came home and wondered why there was a pile of popcorn still laying in the middle of the foyer hall where the two two year olds had made a "snowstorm" for the two big ones while I was trying to make their dinner, feed the dog, answer the phone, fold laundry, wipe noses, clean the bathrooms, save dinner from burning, bake shortcakes, prep our dinner, talk to Spare's father, trip over the dog, run the vacuum, and snatch myself bald. On one cup of coffee.

Did I mention that a very scary dog kept barking and throwing itself at the front door?

I'm just saying that I know I can handle three. There will not be a #4. I know my limits and yesterday I pushed them.

Mom Tip Mondays: Or Not!

I approached this morning with a fearful, "Oh my gosh! I didn't write a Mom Tip this week!" And I still haven't and I will probably end the day the same way. It has nothing to do with all of you. It really is all about me. I'm a lazy butt today who will try to blame it on the fact that I have an extra wee one in the mix this week. Never mind that I managed to get the Valentine's Day decorations down and the St. Paddy's ones up. I guess I just couldn't think of anything that might be helpful for you this week. Maybe next week will be better. In the meantime you'll just have to content yourself with more nonsense tips. I have a few of those brewing away in my skull!

Mom Tip #61: Expect the Expected

Um, Sarah? Don't you mean the "unexpected?" Nope. Sure don't. Because eventually you will expect things to go exactly the opposite of nature. I'm only five years into this mom thing and I'm already indoctrinated to be surprised at nothing.

I was on the phone with The Great Silverback (aka Poppie) the other night. Orangutan was in the playroom being delightfully quiet with her coloring books. Rhino and Marmoset were playing with his wooden train set in the middle of the living room floor and dinner was simmering away on the stove. All was well and The Silverback and I were having a delightful conversation.

Unprovoked and unannounced Marmoset picked up a piece of train track, stood up, and promptly WHACKED Rhino on the head. Without so much as a squeak Rhino picked up a piece of train track, stood up and whacked Marmoset on the head.

Suddenly, both of their eyes flew wide open, their faces contorted as if they were possessed and they let out screams, wails and gnashing of teeth all mashed up together. It was almost as if they were surprised that their skulls were throbbing with cartoonish heartbeats even though they had just actively participated in the exchange.

Silverback immediately said, "You need to go!" To which I very calmly replied, "No, I don't. But give me a second anyway." This was followed by the next very brief exchange.

Marmoset, when you whack your brother you have to expect that he is going to whack you back. Got it? Good.

Rhino, when she stands up with something hard in her hand, it's safe to assume that she is going to whack you with it. Next time duck. Got it? Good.

The Silverback was obviously in tears at my calm and well thought out directions. I'm sure it's awe inspiring to observe my parenting skills in action but I never thought I would move anyone to tears. Then again, if the Grand Keeper (aka Grammy) and her laughter were any indication, the tears may have been more AT me than because of their awe.

Someday I'll be on the Other End.

One of these days I am going to be on my sister's end of the phone during one of these conversations. (She's in red.)

Ouch! Ouch, ouch ouch!! No you can't have another snack! Ouch! You just ate an entire bag of marshmallows and washed it down with another blue cupcake.

Ummm, ok?

I hate wearing shoes. I just tripped coming up the stairs and jammed my wrist trying to get your call. And now I've stepped in dog poo. Has anyone seen my camera? But considering the poo I'm glad I have shoes on right now.

(beginning of giggles)

Please don't touch that! At least until I get a picture. And watch out for dog poo! So how was your day? Oh and yes I did get the e-mail but I think that question might be left over from lunch. And knowing me I already anwered it. I said LOOK OUT FOR THE POOP! Don't eat that!

(hysterical laughter) Yes you answered the question. (followed by more hysterical laughter)

And now I think I know your answer to my humor hunting at The Bowl. When you are looking for laughter you pretty much just call me, right? By the way, I didn't even have pants on this morning when I got your first e-mail about the inside out pants but I'm pretty sure my bra might be on backwards so that makes for about the same day.

Why do you have your brother's shoes on? I can't believe more people didn't know this was a daffodil! Please don't stomp the flowers.

Have I told you that you make my life seem normal?

Don't rub it in!

Love you!

Love you too. WATCH OUT FOR THE...I gotta go.

(hysterical laught.. "click")

Paul Harvey, Ketchup and Cupcakes!

I feel a little like Paul Harvey right now.

I got a lot of comments about how gross Ketchup and Cupcakes sounded. I really feel I should explain that she did not put the ketchup ON the cupcake. And she did not mix the two in anyway.

They had the cupcakes as a late snack yesterday and unbeknownst to me (who was folding ANOTHER load of laundry!) "someone" (read Rhino) had gotten one of the chairs from the dining room table, pushed it into the kitchen, opened the cake safe (in spite of it's side locks) and snagged "seconds."

Do you remember last week when I told you that Silence is NOT Golden? This is me revising that statement to say "Silence is your first warning that SOMETHING is going on!" It was entirely too quiet in the kitchen when the oven timer informed me that the fishsticks were ready.

And that is where the ketchup came into play. But let's not assume that the fishsticks were actually ever put in the ketchup. No. The pan friend potatoes were used as a makeshift spoon to scoop the ketchup up and well, as the picture so aptly demonstrates, SMEAR it all over our face.

Red and blue do NOT make purple! They make a Mess!

And that is the rest of the story. Good Day!

Mom Tip #60: Embrace a Child's Notion of Diversity.

I'm sure you all saw the Presidential news conference Monday night - well, you did if you turned on any one of the major networks or news stations. We happened to turn it on just as it started and Marmoset had taken a seat next to me to mooch part of my dinner.

A little piece of critical backstory - her best friend is a 3 year old African American boy. His mom is one of my closest friends and she's already heard the story so I know she wasn't offended but very highly amused. His two older siblings are also close friends to my children and have spent many an afternoon here deconstructing the playroom. And of course Marmoset attends a very diverse Sunday School class as well.

As soon as she saw the President on TV she looked up at me and said, "K?"
No baby. That's not K. That's Mr. President.
"Mr. Pezzz-dint?"
Right! (that's a big word for a two year old!)
"Pezz-dink K?"
No baby. K isn't the President.
"Pezz-dint head. K head."
Well, yes. The President and K both have heads.
"Pezz-dint nose. K nose."
That's right too.
"Pezz-dint ears. K ears."
Yup.
"Pezz-dint no hab peet (feet). K peet."

You have to love a toddler's concept of object permanance. If you can't see it, it isn't there. So Mr Pezz-dint didn't have feet since she couldn't see them. And since she knows that K has feet that must be what makes him NOT be the pezz-dint.

Wouldn't it be great if we could only tell each other apart by differences like our shirts rather than the differences over our skin?

Wordless Wednesday: Toddler Math.

When this...

Adds this...


And this...

You get this...

Need your Wordless Wednesday fix? Head over to MomDot and check out more from your favorite blogs!

Randomness Round Up!

It's Brain Junk Time! Woo Hoo! Time for me to brain dump all of the loonie stuff that has been swirling around in there and make room for more.

#1. And this is really important. Unless you are a rock star who is jumping the gun and celebrating the big V-Day on Friday instead of on Saturday, I'm guessing very few of you have something to do this Friday night. **Please don't correct me if I'm wrong. I don't want to be the only loser at home alone!**

So here's your something to do! Trisha has been hosting some Live broadcasts from MomDot sharing her knowledge of blogging, SEO (and that's not stick your ear out - silly me!), PR work, and other great blog growing tips she has found that work. But this week in honor of Friday the 13th (collective scream and gasp!) she's going to let us take the night off from school work and PARTAY! If you could see the lineup of sponsors for this thing you would be shorting out your keyboard too!

Tuck those wee cupids into bed early and check in over at MomDot at 8:30 Central (you do the math to find your own time)! Actually you probably want to keep checking in all week because she'll be posting instructions and more info about the games and party and such. Here's hoping I see you there. I hear there are cocktails involved! Everyone together now. "Uh Oh!!...."

Now #2 and this is really the end of the brain junk tonight. I am tired! I had this grand scheme to take the kids outside as much as possible this week since we are having some rock star weather. Fresh air, wide open spaces, running...exhaustion, early bedtimes, sound sleeping...Happy mommy!

Can we spell backfire? I'm beat! Yesterday one hour at the park climbing, running, keeping track of children (some not my own). Today an hour in the front yard planting some spring bulbs and cleaning up some leftovers from Sunday's yard work followed by another hour and a half at the park after we picked up the Orangutan. More running, climbing, tracking children that are not mine in hopes of keeping mine from losing body parts.

And silly me! I'm 31. I really should know better! But I went for it anyway. "Hey Mo! Watch this!" 31 year old mothers of three who are not gymnastics coaches have no business doing cartwheels. They shouldn't even smile at the notion of pulling (every muscle in their legs) one off with grace and skill and without (excruciating, star inducing) pain!